4 Key Strategies to Manage Suicidal Thoughts

Human beings are complex and diverse creatures. Our thoughts are even more complex and diverse. How and what we think has a profound effect on how we experience the world. 

Almost 100% of the time, we think about an action before doing it. Simply getting up to get a snack is first imagined and planned in the mind before it can be executed. This simple fact makes examining and managing your thoughts exceptionally important. This is especially true for anyone thinking about suicide. 

Suicidal ideation is thinking about or planning to commit suicide. Knowing how to manage those thoughts can decide your future and the future of those around you.

Let’s dive into concrete steps you can use to defeat suicidal thoughts. These are not magic cures, but they are tools you can use when the weight feels too heavy.

1. Settle your body and your mind

When negative thoughts feel overwhelming, your body and brain are on high alert. The first step is to calm them down. You can:

• Ground yourself in your senses: name 5 things you see, 4 things you hear, 3 things you feel, 2 things you smell, 1 thing you taste.
• Focus on your breathing: inhale slowly for 4, hold for 2, exhale slowly for 6 (or any comfortable rhythm).
• Move your body gently, such as stretching or walking, to help shift your internal tension.

When your body calms, your mind gets space to think more clearly.

2. Distract yourself (but wisely)

Distraction isn’t avoidance, it’s a temporary break to reduce emotional intensity. Choose activities that help interrupt the downward spiral. For example:

• Listen to a favorite song or playlist
• Watch a comforting movie or show
• Do a physical task (working, cleaning, organizing, washing dishes)
• Go outside: even just stepping into a yard or balcony can help
• Calling or texting someone who cares

The goal isn’t to avoid the pain forever, but to give your brain a momentary reprieve so you can regain control.

3. Counter suicidal thoughts

Once you’re a little calmer, you can start to challenge the suicidal thinking itself. Here are some helpful techniques:

• Reframe negative thoughts: Acknowledge the thought, then ask: “Is there another way to look at this?” or “Is this thought absolutely true?” Reframing helps shift perspective and reduce rigidity in thinking. 
• Replace the thought with a more balanced one: For example, shift the thought that “I can’t handle this pain” to“I’ve survived before, I don’t have to do this alone.”
• Use a safety plan: Write down steps you can follow when you’re in crisis (e.g. warning signs, coping actions, trusted contacts) 
• Limit “what if” questions: Recognize that repeating “what if” or “why me” questions often deepens the struggle; try redirecting to “what now” or “what can help.”

4. Reach out for support

You don’t have to fight these thoughts alone. Connection is a powerful buffer. Here are some ways to connect:

• Call a crisis line if you feel unsafe with your thoughts (in the U.S., dial 988 for the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline)
• Call Union EAP, so we can walk with you on your journey as much and as long as you need us. Toll-free 24/7 hotline: (855) 500-1915
• Tell someone you trust: a friend, family member, counselor, pastor or mentor. You don’t have to have it all figured out ahead of time — just share you’re struggling.
• Work with a mental health professional — therapists, psychiatrists and counselors bring training in evidence-based methods that are shown to reduce risk. 

A thought is not the same as an action. Just because you think something doesn’t mean you have to act on it. These strategies aren’t about forcing the pain away instantly — they are about creating small pauses and openings where another path becomes possible and feels better. 

Sometimes, suicidal thoughts persist even while using these techniques, but calling Union EAP can make a big difference. Our Care Coordinators are for you 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, including holidays and weekends. 

You are not alone. Many people have walked through dark, difficult times in their lives and have come out on the other side. You deserve healing, support and happiness.

Always,

Dr. Calvina Ellerbe

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